Because I have two teenagers in the house, I’m working really hard on not giving advice unless asked. Or offering an opinion unless invited. I tend to be direct with my thoughts, so I find it better for my teens to ask for my input before I launch into what I think or how they should handle a situation. Pretty ambitious right? Because, let’s be honest this really is easier said than done.

One of the ways I’m finding myself slowing down and actually implementing this new behavior is by asking them what I can do to support them. Or what I can do that would feel supportive?

And it’s been a sort of interesting experiment. Because by asking them this, it not only requires me to listen a bit more, but it also requires them to slow down a bit and really think about what they need.  

I mean we all have varying definitions of what support looks like to us and the simple act of assuming we know the answer for one another can be sort of disastrous.  

So the next time you see your partner (or your kids) struggling, slow down to ask them how you can best support them. Truly know the answer of how support would feel FOR THEM before you dive in and start taking action.

I can’t tell you how connective it feels to know what support really looks like for each other.

Until next week,

-A

P.S. If you are struggling to feel supported by your partner or don’t know the words to use to receive that support; reach out.  I’m here to bridge the communication gap that can happen in love.