We celebrated my husband’s birthday this weekend, which marks our official end of summer. My kids go back to school next week, which means we’ll spend this week scrambling to replace worn-out backpacks and shoes that no longer fit.

I always get a little sad when summer ends as there’s something really special about having extra time together. And I think I always worry a little bit about whether I was present enough in those times together. Wanting to make sure that I soaked in every moment and took the most of every opportunity.

And I think if I’m being really honest, I wasn’t. I know I missed stuff, I was distracted, I was overwhelmed… and I was really human.

You see, this expectation that we’re supposed to be present and intentional is just too much for me. 

I simply can’t do it. It’s truly an idea that overwhelms me and makes me look at myself through a very critical lens.

So instead, I’m practicing the art of soaking it all in when I notice myself there.

When I see my daughter racing around the soccer field and it hits me how much she’s growing up, I take an extra breath and smile to myself.

When I notice my son giving a million details in his story about his latest game of whiffle ball with the neighbors, I sigh and laugh along with him.

When I realize my husband has walked in the door from work, I put down my computer and get up to give him a warm welcome home.

And the other times, when these things happen and I don’t slow down to soak them in, I know that’s ok too.

I remind myself that no one can be present for every moment, but I can truly enjoy the moments I do find myself present in.

I encourage you to see how you can flip an expectation of hyper-intentionality into a loving reminder to notice each other in the moments you find yourself present in. Does it help you to be a little less overwhelmed or a whole lot more connected?

I know it sure works for me.

Until next week,

-A

P.S. If you’re struggling with disconnection and overwhelm in your own relationship; please reach out. That’s exactly why I’m here.